I believe this image (from here) of Andy and Sam in Rookie Blue is from season two, but I like the way Andy looks like she is not quite sure if Sam is right -- in the scene, or for her at all. In last week's episode, now season five, her friend Traci asked if Andy and Sam were back together, and Andy replied that she was making lists. Lists of pros and cons, trying to make the list justify what her heart wants, which is Sam.
In a completely different context, I realized that I have been using lists in a similar way, to try to impose some left-brain order on the right-brain chaos that is my creative life. Just one day before this show I wrote a detailed "project plan" that would get all the quilts that are promised to others finished by the end of the year. In my corporate life developing new products and services I never missed a single deadline, and I was known for keeping my eye on the ball. Sometimes it's hard to understand why I cannot seem to meet a creative deadline to save my life. But recently I've been remembering that it was like this in school too. Problem sets -- on time. Essays -- consistently late, but usually worth the wait.
So, I give up.
Goodbye project plan, goodbye UFO lists (again). The heart wants what the heart wants. You'll be seeing lots of new projects over the next few weeks. Let's see what happens when I let my intuition drive for a while. :)